Drive By Shopping

A Deccan Chronicle Photo

Vegetable vendors right in the middle of traffic. If that is not crazy enough, take a look at the video (below) of traffic in the city. The photo is from a local newspaper and the video is from youtube.

We don't need no stinkin' drugs to get a high. Life here is a reality show and driving in traffic is one big rush. ;)

"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone." -Steven Wright

"If everything comes your way, you are in the wrong lane." -Bumper sticker

Top Heavy?

An autorickshaw carrying of a load (of mattresses?). Bicycles, autorickshaws, scooters, buses all sharing the same road. "Mininum clearance" is not in feet, but in inches or centimeters, if at all. Almost all cars are dented or scratched. Horns blare incessantly, not only to overtake but also to let others know of their existence.

"Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams." -Mary Ellen Kelly

Flyover

One of the new flyovers being built. Many flyovers have been built as a measure to reduce traffic congestion. The other measure is to widen the streets. It only worked initially but now the number of new vehicles coming on the road is so high that traffic jams are a daily problem. These flyovers don't connect to any expressways/highways. You just get onto it and fly over intersections below. That is all. But now you see traffic jams on the flyovers as well!! All kinds of vehicles on the roads (bicycles, rickshaws among cars, and 2-wheelers) and no lane discipline, as well as poor or no proper design of lanes, turnouts, islands, etc. all contribute to traffic coming to a complete standstill. In such circumstances (when traffic stops) sometimes the policeman can be seen standing on the sidelines rather than directing traffic. It is probably too overwhelming. In a study done, most of the traffic policemen were found to have suffered a permanent hearing loss due to the din of the traffic and blaring of horns.

A couple of months ago a section of a flyover collapsed after heavy rains. It was being touted as "terror proof" but came down even before its inauguration!!

"The shortest distance between two points is under construction." ~Noelie Altito

Helmet Law

These guys have been stopped by the police for riding their motorbikes without a helmet. "Negotiations" are going on, and people are let off after money changes hands, and by that I don't mean that the guy pays the fine and gets a receipt. Many people ride without helmets even if they have them because it is very hot, or because they want to talk on cell phone!! The law does not require the pillion rider to wear a helmet!! Policemen wait on streets in groups to catch helmetless riders. When they see one, they waive him down. Sometimes the riders speed up instead of slowing down and are able to get away. But at other times, the policeman tries to hit the rider with his stick if he tries to speed up!! In one such incident a youngster lost his life after falling from his bike. There were several minor accidents due to this crude approach. Now the police are beginning to issue an e-ticket (called an "e-challan" here) which arrives by mail after the policeman notes down the number or gets a video. They do this for several things including driving/riding while talking on cell phone, for riding without a helmet, and more recently for driving with number plates which have fancy (difficult to read) lettering. The other day I saw a policman with a small video camera filming the number plates of vehicles at a stop light. But some people have fake licences or fake addresses, so they don't get these tickets. If they have given a fake address, they get caught when they go to renew their licences and have upaid fines. The DMV (Dept of Motor Vehicles, which is called RTA here - Road Transport Authority) is quite modern now and waiting time is said to be less than at the DMV in the US! But I keep hearing that it is still possible to get a license without taking a test (either written or driving), as long as you show up to get your picture taken, if you find a right broker.

When the helmet law was put into effect, there was a mad rush to buy helmets. But they did not have enough helmets and so they were being sold in the black market at a premium. Even in helmets there are fake ones!! There was an uproar when people got fined when enough helmets were not made available at the dealers. So they extended the deadline - several times! Only helmets that bear the ISI (Indian Standards Institute) mark are said to be genuine, although I don't know how anyone would know if the fake ones also carry that same mark....

The motto of the traffic police painted on the red pedestal reads: "For You With You All Ways" (sic)

"It is a great mystery why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets." -Unknown

No Free Parking

If you are not able to view this pic, please click here.

The guy in the green shirt is a parking attendant and is carrying a small machine which prints out receipts. He is having an altercation with the guy on the left who does not want to pay because he "just went to deposit a check in the bank" (meaning did not park long enough).

If you click on the photo you can see a guy in a black t-shirt with blue lettering holding hands with a guy in black shirt. In India if you see guys holding hands, or a guy with his hand around the other guy's shoulder while walking or chatting, it does NOT necessarily mean they are gay!! Beyond them there is a kid in orange shirt riding on the gas tank of a motorbike. The guy riding the bike is carrying TWO more kids behind him, but in the photo you can see only part of the leg of the kid sitting right behind him; there is one more kid behind that kid! Needless to say it is illegal for more than two people to ride a bike but it is a common sight to see three youngsters on one bike. It is also a common sight to see people walking in the street as there are hardly any sidewalks left, but even when there are sidewalks, you can still see people walking on the street causing traffic to go around them or causing traffic to slow down. Every day a few pedestrians are injured or killed. Walking is a risky activity.

The municipal corporation has invited tenders from developers to build parking lots, but NONE have come forth so far because the land prices are exorbitant. The municipal corporation should ideally build and operate parking lots but they are more interested in selling land at exhorbitant prices.

"A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works." -Bill Vaughan

"There are two kinds of pedestrians - the quick and the dead." -Thomas Robert Dewar

"Ah... so many pedestrians, so little time...." -Robin Williams